Category Archives: Politics

City Hall — Bert Miller Under Investigation

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In March of this year, internal audit and compliance director Etta Dunning urged that Birmingham City Councilor Bert Miller be investigated regarding a $25,000 expenditure for a concert that never took place. Dunning asked that the U.S. Justice Department and the Jefferson County District Attorney’s office look into the matter. Concern had been raised earlier this year about a lack of accountability for the more than $400,000 the city annually hands out to arts and cultural groups.

Miller is chair of the Parks and Recreation Cultural Arts Committee, which supervises the arts executive committee. The councilor claimed the executive committee approved $25,000 for a concert promoted by Teen Rock International, Inc. But several months ago committee members denied that the $25,000 had been approved, or that Teen Rock had even made a presentation to the committee. Bert Miller nonetheless added the item to the City Council agenda, after which the Council voted for the expenditure 7 to 2, with Councilors Joel Montgomery and Carol Reynolds voting against it.

“The money was approved by the full Council . . . Once it leaves the City Council’s dais, and was approved by the Council, I’m through with it . . . I don’t know what happened after that.” —Councilor Bert Miller

A report prepared by Dunning’s office said the $25,000 should be paid back to the city by Miller and two individuals affiliated with Teen Rock. The report also stated that an accompanying workshop was never conducted.

Birmingham Mayor Bernard Kincaid said he will ask the Alabama Ethics Commission to investigate Miller.

On Tuesday, July 19, Miller held an impromptu press conference outside his office at City Hall. “I’ve done no wrongdoing,” said Miller. “The Mayor and city attorney had different opinions. They had a prosecutor who’s a friend, and I think it’s a political witch hunt.” When asked about his absence from recent council meetings, the councilor grew angry. “I’ve been ill. I stated in the record, I’ve been in Brookwood Hospital; I almost lost my life! Do they have any consideration for that? I was sick! I had a heart virus! Make sure that’s on TV, OK? I was told by my heart doctor not to come [to council meetings]!

Regarding any awareness on his part about impropriety by Teen Rock, Miller again grew angry and said, “Once it leaves the City Council and is voted on by the full Council, I’m through with it. Let’s go on to the next item!” Miller added, “The money was approved by the full Council, and that’s where the buck stops . . . Once it leaves the City Council’s dais, and was approved by the Council, I’m through with it . . . I don’t know what happened after that.”

 

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Miller announced last year that he was bankrupt. In recent years, he has claimed to have given away thousands of dollars to help poor residents pay bills. On some occasions, he drew names from a bowl in his council office to decide who would receive the money. During public appearances, Miller sometimes handed out fistfuls of cash to screaming women as if he were a game show host. Newspaper headlines often touted Miller as the “money man.” &

 

City Council Approves Sears Building Purchase

City Council Approves Sears Building Purchase

June 30, 2005 

On June 14, the Birmingham City Council voted to spend $1.525 million to purchase the former Sears building in downtown Birmingham. Joel Montgomery was the only councilor to vote against the transaction. The dilapidated building, owned by Barber Properties, has been appraised at $3.05 million. The Birmingham Entrepreneurial Center, currently housed in the former Tillman-Levinson building, will pay the remainder of the purchase price. The Entrepreneurial Center will combine with UAB’s Office for the Advancement of Developing Industries [OADI] to move into the Sears structure after $12 million in renovations have been completed.

UAB has decided to close OADI, currently located in Oxmoor Valley. OADI Executive Director and Entrepreneurial Center President Susan Matlock said it has been difficult trying to attract to Oxmoor Valley any emerging businesses that result from technology commercialized by UAB. She added that UAB faculty affiliated with OADI had complained that the distance from campus to the Oxmoor location was a detriment to the process. Al Herbert of the Mayor’s office echoed Matlock’s observations about proximity, adding, “The tenants [at OADI] are displeased with the amount of travel time from the facility to downtown [Entrepreneurial Center].” OADI and the Entrepreneurial Center have been associated for approximately two decades.

Upon finalization of the transaction, the city will deed the purchased Sears property to the Entrepreneurial Center, according to guidelines stipulated in securing the $12 million loan. Part of the funding involves new market tax credits, which require that the Entrepreneurial Center spend all the funds by the end of the year following the one in which the money is borrowed. The city has the right to buy out the Entrepreneurial Center’s half of the initial $3.05-million purchase should the business incubator fail to secure the loan. If the Entrepreneurial Center sells the property to an unrelated third party, the city is entitled to recoup its investment plus 3 percent interest.

“I think $2.5 million to get 1,000 people to working is pretty good numbers.” —Councilor Carole Smitherman

Matlock said OADI and the Entrepreneurial Center have generated $1 billion in economic impact when applying economic multipliers, in addition to the revenue produced by industries in the business incubators. The “multipliers” reflect money turning over in the local economy, according to Matlock. Once the two incubators move into the Sears building, income of the expected 65 businesses that would be housed there is projected to be $334 million, with an additional $664 million when economic multipliers are factored in. Matlock said more than 1,200 are expected to be employed by the incubator. When asked how the new Entrepreneurial Center would be affected should businesses from OADI relocate elsewhere upon closure of the Oxmoor facility, Matlock said there have been 70 to 80 applicants per year for the business incubators over the past 20 years that the entities have been in operation. She did not feel that filling the new incubator should be a problem.

“I think $2.5 million to get 1,000 people to working is pretty good numbers,” said Councilor Carole Smitherman, who had been skeptical of the project during the June 6 finance and budget committee meeting. “If we’re going to capture the creative class and give them a place to work, to invent their ideas and make them work, I want to make sure that Birmingham is that place. What we are doing is fighting a battle every day to keep our young people in Birmingham.”

Councilor Roderick Royal questioned the wisdom of paying the fair market value for a property no one wants. (The Sears building has been an eyesore for well over a decade.) Royal, who supports the project, suggested, “I don’t think we ought to be paying for something, certainly at the appraisal price, that nobody else wants or has any use for at this time.” Councilor Joel Montgomery had asked for information from the city’s revenue department on June 10, regarding which graduates of the business incubators were paying property, sales, and occupational taxes to the city. As of June 20, Montgomery still had not received the information he requested. &

Dead Folks 2005, Authors, Inventors, and Astronauts

Dead Folks 2005, Authors, Inventors, and Astronauts

A look back at the notable names and personalities who called it quits last year.

February 24, 2005

Authors

Susan Sontag

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Susan Sontag (click for larger version)

Once viewers catch on that Woody Allen’s 1983 comedy Zelig is a fake documentary about a man who never actually existed, the joke is in how extensively Allen creates a pastiche of the documentary form. The requisite pauses in the story for comments by observers, analysts, and sundry talking heads are the funniest part of Allen’s method, and the funniest talking head is Susan Sontag. That’s not because she has any funny lines. It’s because she doesn’t. So influential, profound, and brilliant are Sontag’s critical views on all matters cultural, that her very presence in the film signifies the ultimate commentary. The scene is equivalent to Gertrude Stein, Edmund Wilson, or Jean Paul Sartre making a cameo appearance in a Bob Hope comedy.

After entering college at age 16 and fairly blowing away everyone at Berkeley, University of Chicago, Harvard, and the Sorbonne, the groovy brunette with a bride-of-Frankenstein streak in her mane decided to share with the world her innumerable ideas about art and life (for her they were indistinguishable). An article published in Partisan Review in 1964 called “Notes on Camp” was, in literary circles, akin to The Rolling Stones appearing on “The Ed Sullivan Show,” or maybe even the premiere of Citizen Kane. With that essay, and subsequent “assaults” in The Atlantic Monthly, Granta, The New York Review of Books, and various other intellectually inclined periodicals, Sontag provided a brand new way of discussing significant ideas in Western culture and minor ideas in popular culture. The new Bob Dylan album, Godard’s latest film, William James, and Freud were all part of the same story—or critique. Each was crucial to understanding the human creative experience. Yet during her explosion onto the arts and literary scene of the 1960s, what was most exciting for the hipsters, bohemians, and New York intellectuals who embraced/feared her was that Sontag made feasible the notion that one could read everything and know everything that mattered. She simultaneously demonstrated that no one could do it better. In that context, it’s extremely revealing that Sontag once defined the term “polymath” as “a person who is interested in everything, and nothing else.”

The publication of Sontag’s collection of essays titled Against Interpretation (1968) was virtually tectonic in its impact. Here she argues that understanding any work of art starts from intuitive response and not from analysis or intellectual considerations. “A work of art is a thing in the world, not just text or commentary on the world.” Other important works such as On Photography and Illness as Metaphor brought challenging ideas about contemporary culture out of the academy and into popular discourse. Not on Johnny Carson’s show, of course, or in the daily newspapers, but Sontag did to some extent prop open the doors to formerly exclusive salons. That’s mainly because her lucid, confident writing style, which is reinforced by a devastating (and yet somehow celebratory) wealth of intellectual inquiry and research, remains free of academic jargon and postmodern tics.

Such a position as a cultural critic implies a certain amount of controversy, which Sontag always could generate with a few comments. The left-leaning, radical thinker might be famously wrong at times, but one feather in her cap was confronting her lefty pals and stating that “socialism is the human face of fascism.” She was also right about Sarajevo. But regarding her notorious claim that September 11 was the result of U.S. international policies and actions, well, remain on the far left long enough and you’re bound to self-destruct. —David Pelfrey

Daniel Boorstin

The Librarian of Congress from 1975 to 1987, Boorstin loved books and couldn’t understand why anyone else might not; he coined the term “aliterate” to describe those who could read but chose not to. During his tenure, appropriations for the Library of Congress rose from $116 million to more than double that figure, the vast holdings were opened to the public, and Boorstin established the Mary Pickford Theater to call attention to (and utilize) the library’s huge archive of motion pictures. He was the nation’s top cheerleader for libraries in general. Boorstin’s deepest interest was in history, although he was fond of pointing out that he was an amateur and not a professionally trained historian. That’s actually not worth pointing out, however, as he taught history at the University of Chicago for 25 years, held a post as director and senior historian at the Smithsonian Museum of History and Technology, and wrote a Pulitzer Prize-winning trilogy on American history and a subsequent four-volume history of the world. —D.P.

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

“Whoever has seen the horrifying appearance of the postwar European concentration camps would be similarly preoccupied.” That’s Swiss psychiatrist Elisabeth Kubler-Ross (78) speaking of her obssession with changing the treatment of dying patients. Kubler-Ross was greatly disturbed by what she witnessed in New York hospitals when she visited the U.S. in 1958. Her interest in death and her intensive study of the behavior of the terminally ill led to the publication of On Death and Dying in 1969. In less than a decade the book was a standard reference text for medical ethics and hospital policy. Her celebrated theory of the five stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance) remains a valuable model of human behavior not only for patients, but also for loved ones, medical professionals, and caregivers. —D.P.

Olivia Goldsmith

The film version of The First Wives’ Club was a jaunty celebration of older women getting revenge on the thoughtless husbands who abandoned them for younger women. There were also plenty of jibes at cosmetic surgery, as also found in the source novel by Olivia Goldsmith (54). Too bad the author didn’t take her pro-aging stance more seriously. Instead, Goldsmith died from complications related to anesthesia during cosmetic surgery. —J.R.T.

Norris McWhirter

Along with twin brother Ross, Norris McWhirter (78) founded the Guinness Book of Records. Its first edition was printed in 1955, and among its earliest records was a Russian woman who gave birth to 16 sets of twins, seven sets of triplets, and four sets of quadruplets from 1725 to 1765. According to its own records, the Guinness Book of Records is the world’s best-selling copyrighted book, with more than 100 million sold. The McWhirter twins personally crammed 70 people into a compact car just to set a record. Ross was murdered in 1975 after posting a 50,000-pound reward for information leading to the arrest of Irish Republican Army terrorists. —E.R.

Inventors and Innovators

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Estee Lauder attracts a crowd (click for larger version)


Estee Lauder

Growing up in an apartment above her father’s hardware store in Queens, Josephine Esther Mentzer was a nice Jewish girl with an ambitious spirit and an intense fascination with the lotions and potions her chemist uncle prepared in a little shop. She liked them so much that in 1946 she began selling skin creams at beach resorts and hotels. The determined Esther expanded her product line and practically bullied her way onto some counter space at Saks Fifth Avenue two years later, by which time she and her husband Joseph Lauder had created a “nice little company.” The products were fine, but the sales program was outstanding: exquisitely attired staff, sophisticated sales patter, and, by the way, madam . . . here’s a free sample (a.k.a. “the gift”). By 1953 the company was a well-recognized force in the cosmetics industry.

Its success was due to Lauder’s making certain that those free gifts and samples found their way into the handbags of the hottest celebrities, the social elite, and the otherwise well-to-do. If that meant entertaining guests on a lavish scale (plenty of fine wine, fine cuisine, and cartons of free cosmetics), well, that was just part of the sales game; “If I believe in something, I sell it, and I sell it hard,” she was fond of saying. A more famous, and certainly more profit-generating, quote was “There are no ugly women.” It was that attitude, along with Lauder’s sheer force of will, that helped create a $10 billion enterprise with locations in 130 countries and a daunting product line that includes MAC, Aveda, Clinique, Aramis, and Prescriptives, the sum of which currently constitutes a stunning 45 percent share of the cosmetics business in the United States. Estee Lauder is the only woman on Time‘s list of the 20 most influential business figures of the 20th century. She was 97. —D.P.

Al Lapin, Jr.

In 1958, Lapin and his brother Jerry invested $25,000 and founded the International House of Pancakes. “Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruity” was an early marketing slogan for ridiculously sweet fruit-topped pancakes and waffles drenched in blueberry, boysenberry, strawberry, or maple syrup. Lapin (76) later owned the Orange Julius chain. His first venture was Coffee Time, carts that delivered urns of hot coffee to offices. Attractive presentation was of utmost importance, both in his personal attire and restaurants. Among his favorite sayings were “People eat with their eyes before they eat with their hands,” and “You have to look like a dollar to borrow a dime.” —Ed Reynolds

Francis Crick

Everyone who ever suffered through sophomore biology classes in high school has sketched (or traced) in their lab notebook the double helix, that famous twisted ladder of deoxyribonucleic acid, more commonly known as DNA. Today the term has made a complete transition from scientific jargon to the popular lexicon. Disparaging remarks about the origin of someone’s DNA or gene pool are common, as are police investigations (in the real world or in television dramas) that rely on DNA evidence. The business of bio-engineering and gene therapy is a huge industry now. Half a century ago, however, the very structure of DNA was a great mystery.

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Francis Crick (click for larger version)

It certainly intrigued the British-born biologist Francis Crick (88) and his young American-born colleague James Watson, both of whom were grappling with this puzzle at the Cavendish Laboratory in Cambridge, England, during the early 1950s. The pair finally concluded with the double helix, although confirmation of their results did not come for years. Crick nonetheless announced to friends at the University that they had “discovered the secret to life.” His approach was more subtle when it came time to publish their results in Nature in 1953, yet one particular understatement may resonate for all time: “It has not escaped our notice that the specific pairing we have postulated immediately suggests a possible copying mechanism for the genetic material.” In 1962 Crick and Watson were awarded the Nobel Prize. —David Pelfrey

Sir Godfrey Hounsfield

In the 1960s, British electrical engineer Sir Godfrey Hounsfield created the computerized axial tomography scanner—the CAT scan. The CAT scan used X-rays to create three-dimensional images of the body’s interior, revolutionizing medical care. —E.R.

Dr. William Dobelle

William Dobelle (62) developed an experimental artificial vision system for the sight-impaired that involved transmission of electrical signals to electrodes implanted in the brain by way of a tiny camera attached to the user’s glasses. A portable computer receives images that are then sent to electrodes in the brain’s visual cortex. Four years before his death, his creation restored navigational vision to a blind volunteer. “I’ve always done artificial organs,” Dobelle told the New York Times. “I’ve spent my whole life in the spare-parts business.” —E.R.

Tom Hannon

The “father of the automated teller machine,” Tom Hannon pioneered the use of ATMs in locations other than banks. In the early 1990s he had machines in four Southern states. By the time he sold his U S. operation in 2002 to enter the British market, he had 2,500 machines in 40 states. —E.R.

Samuel M. Rubin

Popcorn was probably reasonably priced when Sam Rubin (85) began selling it in movie theaters during the Depression. He’d already built an empire with assorted New York City locations, but Sam changed the way we enjoy movies when he took his popcorn stands into theater chains such as RKO and Loews. His empire signaled the end of vending machines as the preferred mode of movie snacking. Rubin can also claim credit for inventing those oversized boxes of candy that sell for five times what you’d pay outside a movie theater. —J.R. Taylor

Red Adair

During the Gulf War in 1991, Iraqi troops retreating from Kuwait set fire to oil wells in the high-producing Ahmadi and Magwa fields, creating a potentially monumental economic and environmental disaster. All the task forces and experts, along with the team working for legendary oil well firefighter Paul “Red” Adair (89), agreed that extinguishing these mammoth fires would take three to five years. Thanks to the consultation, logistical support, and special equipment provided by Adair’s organization, the task was accomplished in nine months. This was a stunning feat, but observers familiar with Adair’s history were not really shocked. At the time, Adair already had more than 40 years of experience battling wild wells, blow outs, and other conflagrations in the deserts and on the high seas. (Adair’s amazing story is told in Hellfighters, starring John Wayne.)

Throughout the 1960s and ’70s, any time an oil rig exploded Adair’s team was called into action; the media coverage of these events justifiably portrayed Red Adair as an American hero. One of his more spectacular deeds involved the huge oil flame in the Sahara known as “The Devil’s Cigarette.” Today the highly specialized devices designed by Red Adair Service and Marine Company, Inc., are regarded as the Rolls Royces of firefighting equipment. —D.P.

Space is the Place

Gordon Cooper

One of the original seven Mercury astronauts, Gordon Cooper (77) was perhaps the most controversial for his belief that the U.S. government was keeping secrets about UFOs. In 1951, Cooper was part of a squadron scrambled into the air over Germany after metallic objects resembling saucers were spotted flying in formation. Cooper also maintained that he saw a UFO crash at Edwards Air Force Base in California. He filmed the incident, but the film was confiscated by government officials. While orbiting the earth in Gemini 5, Cooper infuriated federal authorities when he inadvertently photographed the top-secret Nevada military base known as Area 51 while shooting outer space photos as part of a Pentagon film experiment.

Cooper was the first American to remain in space for an entire day when he flew the last Mercury mission in 1963. Despite his controversial UFO fascination and associated conspiracy theories, he was the backup commander for the Apollo 10 mission that flew to within 50,000 feet of the moon. On his Mercury mission, the electrical system failed, and Cooper had to pilot the spacecraft manually back to earth to splashdown. Cooper’s belief in UFOs was so strong that he testified about them to the United Nations in 1978 in hope that the U.N. would become a repository for collecting UFO sightings. He also wrote a book urging the government to tell what it knew about UFOs. Most, however, probably remember Cooper through Dennis Quaid’s portrayal of the astronaut in The Right Stuff. —E.R.

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Gordon Cooper (click for larger version)

Maxime Faget

While scientists were designing rockets to launch astronauts into outer space, Maxime Faget’s job was to bring space travelers home in one piece. Designer of the Mercury space capsule, which ushered the U.S. into the age of manned space flight, Faget’s dilemma was to protect a spacecraft and its occupants from heat when re-entering the earth’s atmosphere. (Astronauts return at 17,000 miles per hour in a craft that reaches temperatures of 4,000 degrees Fahrenheit.) Earliest theories called for a needle-nosed spaceship to cut down on air resistance, but Faget (83) scoffed at such Buck Rogers notions and designed a blunt-bodied craft that entered blunt end first to deflect most of the heat away from the craft. —E.R.

Fred Whipple

Originator of the “dirty snowball” concept, comet expert Fred Whipple (97) introduced the idea in 1950 that comets were balls of ice. This broke from the popular notion that comets were wads of sand held together by gravity. Whipple recognized that a comet’s arrival at a particular destination in outer space did not follow the predictability of gravitational pull only. He instead theorized that as a comet approached the sun, sunlight vaporized ice in its nucleus. Jets of particles resulted, functioning as a rocket engine to speed up or slow down the comet. Close-up photos of Halley’s Comet in 1986 proved Whipple to be correct. Whipple was also responsible for coming up with the idea of cutting aluminum foil into thousands of pieces and releasing the fragments from Allied aircraft over Germany. The tiny bits of foil confused the enemy; it appeared that thousands of planes were attacking. Some speculate that this is where the phrase “foiled again” originated. —E.R.

William H. Pickering

Director of Jet Propulsion Laboratories in California from 1954 to 1976, Pickering (93) was in charge of the United States’ first robotic missions to the moon, Venus, and Mars. Three months after Russia put the first satellite, Sputnik, into orbit in 1957, America launched Explorer I, its first orbiting spacecraft. A New Zealand-born electrical engineer, Pickering was a central figure in the Ranger and Surveyor landings on the moon, precursors to the Apollo flights that landed men on the moon. Initially, the Army oversaw Jet Propulsion Lab activity, but turned it over to NASA after the Russians launched Sputnik. —E.R.

Dead Folks 2005, Politics and Sports

Dead Folks 2005, Politics and Sports

A look back at the notable names and personalities who called it quits last year.

 

February 24, 2005Politics/News

Pierre Salinger

 

As one of the lesser lights of John F. Kennedy’s Camelot, Pierre Salinger (79) worked hard to maintain his fame after serving as Presidential Press Secretary to JFK and Lyndon Johnson. He rushed the book A Tribute to John F. Kennedy into bookstores after the Kennedy assassination and would later be appointed as a Senator in 1964 after the death of a California incumbent. Then he was promptly voted out of office when he sought legitimate election, partly because he didn’t really live in California. After that, Salinger showed up as an attorney in an episode of “Batman,” and was a panelist on two episodes of “What’s My Line?” The former ABC news correspondent finally went away for good after making an ass out of himself in 1997. Salinger held plenty of news conferences proclaiming that he had absolute proof that the U.S. Navy had shot down TWA Flight 800, which had crashed with no survivors off of Long Island in 1996. It turned out Salinger had found all of his revealing documents on this new thing called the Internet, and nobody had explained to him that any crackpot could put together a collection of conspiracy theories and post it on a web site. Not surprisingly, Salinger passed away in France. —J.R.T. 

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Pierre Salinger (click for larger version)

Charles Woods

Perennial political candidate and Dothan media and real estate tycoon Charles Woods (83) was the butt of many a cruel grade-school joke. Severely disfigured after a fiery World War II B-17 crash, Woods ran for governor of Alabama several times during the 1960s and ’70s, and even launched a bid for the U.S. presidency that once landed him a guest spot on David Letterman’s show. His bald, earless head, which sported an eyepatch, inspired children across Alabama to stylishly transform their thumbs into the head of Woods, complete with the eyepatch courtesy of a ballpoint pen. —E.R.

Mary McGrory

An outspoken liberal reporter on the Washington, D.C., political scene for 50 years, Mary McGrory (85) won the Pulitzer Prize in 1975 for her columns on Watergate. McGrory first made a name for herself reporting on the Army-McCarthy hearings in 1954 (“an Irish bully” was her assessment of Senator Joseph McCarthy). Her final pieces criticized the Bush administration for invading Iraq. McGrory often referred to Congress as the “federal entertainment center.” Among her accomplishments was inclusion on President Nixon’s famous enemies list. —E.R.

David Dellinger

Often described as a “radical pacifist,” David Dellinger (88) was a leading organizer of nonviolent antiwar protests in the 1960s; it was Dellinger who created the encirclement of the Pentagon immortalized by Norman Mailer in his 1967 account, “Armies of the Night.” His close contact with North Vietnamese officials allowed him to escort several American airmen held as prisoners back to the United States. Civil disobedience was his game. He got the harshest sentence in the political conspiracy trial of the Chicago Seven: five years and a $5,000 fine. Dellinger was a devoted follower of Rev. A. J. Muste’s movement supporting pacifism during World War II. He went to prison for a year in 1943 for draft evasion. Upon his release, he refused to report for his military physical, though he was exempt from actual induction because he was a seminary student. This got him locked up for two more years at a maximum security prison. —E.R.

Archibald Cox and Samuel Dash

Former President Richard Nixon shocked more than a few folks when he fired Watergate special prosecutor Archibald Cox. Oddly enough, Cox, (92) died the same day as 79-year-old Samuel Dash, the chief counsel to the U.S. Senate committee that investigated the Watergate scandal. It was Dash who urged a White House aide to reveal that Nixon was taping conversations with officials. Cox subpoenaed the recordings while investigating the burglary and subsequent cover-up. When Cox refused edited versions of the tapes, Nixon fired him. The former president resigned in 1974. Samuel Dash, an ethics adviser to Kenneth Starr, who investigated former President Bill Clinton, resigned from that position when he felt Starr was abusing his powers as an investigator by advocating Clinton’s impeachment. —E.R.

Yasser Arafat

The celebrity buzz in Hell right now is that Arafat and Hitler are sharing an apartment. That’s not so shocking; the two are both known for their “let’s kill all the Jews” world view. Yet one wonders what else they could possibly have in common. (A deep and abiding fondness for denial and subterfuge? Not much to build a marriage on.) Anyway, one also wonders just who is making whom wear the shiny boots. —D.P.

Abu Abbas

Abu Abbas (55) was the Palestinian Liberation Front (PLO) terrorist behind the 1985 hijacking of the Italian passenger ship Achille Lauro. An elderly, wheelchair-bound Jewish American tourist was pushed overboard during the seige. A 1995 peace agreement between Israel and the Palestinians included immunity for PLO members for any terrorist activity committed before September 1993, the month the two sides established a mutual recognition agreement. As a result, Abbas made his first visit to Gaza in 1996 after Israel declared that he was no longer a threat. Abbas was captured by American forces in Iraq in April 2004. He died in U.S. custody. —E.R.

Sports

 

Tug McGraw

 

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Tug McGraw (click for larger version)

Nowadays, a wacky sports figure is somebody who runs over a nun while eluding the cops in the aftermath of a drug bust. Tug McGraw (59) represented a more genial age. He would’ve been eccentric enough as a left-handed pitcher leading the New York Mets and Philadelphia Phillies to their first World Series. McGraw pretty much summed up the quotable ’70s when—asked for his preference between grass and Astroturf—he responded that he’d never actually smoked the latter. McGraw also knew how to stage a photo op, as when he arranged for fellow Phillie Mike Schmidt to jump into his arms after winning the 1980 World Series. After his retirement in 1985, McGraw made appearances in a custom suit that combined his Mets and Phillies uniforms. He died in the home of country star Tim McGraw, who only discovered Tug was his real father after finding his birth certificate at the age of 11. The father had originally agreed to pay for Tim’s education as a condition for no further contact, but apparently he was just too damn lovable to leave it at that. —J.R. Taylor


Larry Ponza

Lorenzo “Larry” Ponza perfected the modern pitching machine, a marvelous invention that has entertained many a drunken tourist as they swat at baseballs in batting cages up and down the Florida coastline. Ponza (86) created the prototype for pitching machines with his “Power Pitcher” in 1952. In 1974 he built “The Hummer,” an invaluable tool used for batting instruction by both Little Leaguers and major leaguers. The inventor kept improving on his work with the “Casey” in 1983, the “Ponza Swing King” in 1987, and the “Rookie” in 1988. —E.R.

John H. Williams

As the son of legendary baseball icon Ted Williams, John Williams (35) got his name in the history books after a much-publicized bout with his sister over whether their father’s body should be cremated or cryogenically preserved for future resurrection. The male Williams prevailed, and his father’s head was removed and frozen. However, the cryogenics company later threatened to thaw out the late slugger’s head for disposal unless the younger Williams paid the laboratory $111,000 it was owed. No word on what was done with the younger Williams’ noggin upon death. —Ed Reynolds

John Kelley

John Kelley (97) ran in 61 Boston Marathons, finishing 58 and winning two. Running in his first in 1928, he finally won in 1935, and completed his last in 1992 at age 84, running the entire 26 miles. At age 65 he said his motivation to continue competing was “to try to beat the girls.” —E.R.

Brian Maxwell

One of the top marathoners in the world in the late 1970s and early 1980s, Brian Maxwell (51) made a fortune after he and his wife created the Powerbar, a sports energy snack, in their kitchen in 1986. Maxwell died of a heart attack at age 51 while waiting in line at the post office. Former San Francisco 49ers quarterback Steve Young was an early customer who began eating the Powerbar when they were still being made in the Maxwells’ apartment. Young credited the Powerbar for revolutionizing the sports world’s approach to healthy living. “[Before the Powerbar], players smoked at halftime in the locker room,” said Young. —E.R.

Joe Gold

Joe Gold (82) was an early bodybuilding pioneer. He opened Gold’s Gym in the Venice section of Los Angeles in 1965 and sold it in the early 1970s. They were subsequently franchised across the country. In 1977, Gold started World Gym, the setting for Arnold Schwarzenegger’s film Pumping Iron. As a teen, Gold discovered California’s “Muscle Beach,” which set in place his devotion to bodybuilding. He often worked out with railroad ties and buckets of hardened concrete. —E.R.

Sidney James

In 1954 Sidney James became the founding editor of Sports Illustrated. The first issue sold for 25 cents. James, who had coordinated the first televised coverage of the Republican and Democratic conventions in 1948, convinced William Faulkner, Robert Frost, Ernest Hemingway, and John Steinbeck to contribute pieces to the magazine. —E.R.

Walter F. Riker, Jr.

As drug adviser for the NFL, Riker was an expert on the effects of drugs on muscular and neuromuscular systems. Riker advised professional football in the early 1970s when amphetamine use by pro athletes was booming. In the 1980s, he addressed the escalation of cocaine among players and warned that steroids would one day be a major dilemma. —E.R.

Marge Schott

Anybody who thinks racism isn’t funny never saw Marge Schott (75) in action. The outspoken former owner of the Cincinnati Reds constantly made headlines with her idiocy, and got the occasional fine for racial slurs. That’s what happens when a trashy broad inherits an empire after her husband dies. Schott had been best known in Cincinnati for her dopey TV ads for her car dealership—in which she co-starred with a dog—but she spent the ’90s as the spokeswoman for privileged obliviousness. Reds owner Carl Lindner said, “She will be remembered for her love of baseball and for her passion for the Cincinnati Reds.” There’s some wishful thinking. It’ll be hard to top the memory of Schott proclaiming, “Everybody knows [Adolf Hitler] was good at the beginning, but he just went too far.” —J.R.T.

The Gospel According to Reverend Al

The Gospel According to Reverend Al

Satirist Al Franken sharpens his political ax.

 

January 27, 2005

With the possible exceptions of Michael Moore and Hillary Clinton, no liberal is more despised by conservatives than Al Franken. His volatile public spat with Bill O’Reilly after Franken called him a liar for claiming that “Inside Edition,” where O’Reilly had been an anchor, had won a Peabody Award, led to a hilarious battle of insults between the two on C-SPAN in 2003. O’Reilly had actually won a Polk award but claims merely to have mixed up the names. Franken refused to let him off the hook, however. To this day, O’Reilly refuses to so much as utter Franken’s name, much less have him as a guest either on his radio or Fox television program. Franken was also sued by Fox News for using the phrase “fair and balanced” in the title of his book Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right. The suit was eventually thrown out.

 

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Satirist Al Franken performs at the Alys Stephens Center on Saturday, February 12. (click for larger version)

 

 

Franken’s publicist suggested a five-minute interview, but Franken, who had just finished his Air America political radio program minutes earlier, said he had nothing urgent that afternoon. He graciously and enthusiastically chatted for half an hour. When he laughs, he often sounds like one of the Tappet Brothers (Tom and Ray Magliozzi), who host “Car Talk” on NPR. Franken will appear at the Alys Stephens Center’s Jemison Concert Hall on Saturday, February 12, at 8 p.m.

B&W: I read a quote from Mort Sahl where he said “Comedy has changed. It isn’t funny anymore.” Do you agree?

Franken: No (laughs). Some comedy isn’t funny. But some comedy is. That’s something that will never change (laughs).

B&W: We have to go to our computers to listen to Air America in Birmingham.

Franken: Or you can get it on Sirius or XM. But I understand; I’d love to have it down in Birmingham.

B&W: Is that an example of perhaps how culturally backwards the South is?

Franken: (Laughing) No, we’re not in places in the North (laughs). We have 45 stations; I mean, we’re adding stations all the time. We’re just adding Detroit, which is pretty far north, as our scientists tell us . . . I’d love to be in Birmingham. Birmingham is a town I’ve been talking about to people at Air America for a while. Obviously they go after the largest markets first, and so that’s the priority. But I kind of like the idea of being in Birmingham.

B&W: Anything in particular about Birmingham that attracts you?

Franken: Well, I don’t know. It seems like the most progressive town in Alabama . . .

B&W: That’s not saying a whole lot.

Franken: Well, maybe Huntsville, too. I’d rather be in Birmingham than Anniston. It’s bigger. But I’d love to be in Anniston!

B&W: I’m curious about Clear Channel’s addition of Air America in the San Diego market. When they did that, they changed the call letters of the station there to KLSD.

Franken: Yeah, and it was like “Liberal San Diego” is what they tell us. It wasn’t like (does a stoner Tommy Chong-like voice), “Hey man, we want LSD (laughs).” So I heard that, and my heart sank. I don’t why they did that. I guess it’s memorable. I think in Austin we may be on KOKE, which I’m not thrilled with either.


B&W:
Tell me about the recent USO tour.

Franken: It was the second year in a row that I did a USO tour to Kuwait, Iraq, and Afghanistan. And, basically, I spent most of my time with rednecks. You know, Mark Wills, the country star, and Darryl Worley, and Bradshaw, the wrestler. And I liked them enormously. . . . All of us on that tour, we deliberately did the same tour [together] the next year.

B&W: Were the soldiers fairly receptive to your USO performances?

Franken: People ask me that all the time, and I’ve done five USO tours—and, of course, I think more and more recently I’ve been known more for my politics—never once have I had a soldier say anything other than, “Our politics are totally different, but thanks for coming over.” And that makes a lot of sense. If you’ve done these tours, you know that they so appreciate not just the entertainers but anybody coming over.

B&W: Do you still respect Colin Powell even though he supported the Iraq invasion?

Franken: Yeah, I still have respect for Colin Powell, I do. I believe that the day he testified before the U.N. was the low point of his career . . . I don’t think it’s just having been to Iraq [on a USO tour], but I did come back kind of angry, because we do have magnificent soldiers. I went to some hospitals in Iraq and talked to guys who were grievously wounded. Very, very, very young—my kid’s age. And it tears me up, because I think that we went to war under false pretenses. And then not only that, we prosecuted the war in an incredibly incompetent way that was due to hubris and, worse than that, laziness. I think that Powell does the right thing, famously quoted in the Woodward book, which is, “If you break it, you own it.” You know, the Pottery Barn rule. Which, by the way, isn’t the Pottery Barn rule. We immediately at Air America were the first ones to break this story: It’s not the Pottery Barn rule because you can accidently break something in a Pottery Barn, and you don’t pay for it. To me that meant that if you’re the president and your secretary of state says, “If you break it, you own it,” you should know that already, but your job is to understand what that means. And there was planning done by the state department called The Future of Iraq Project, and all this is very, very well detailed in James Fallows’ article “Blind Into Baghdad” in the January/February 2004 Atlantic Monthly. And there was planning done by the CIA and planning done by the Army War College, which is a 1,500-page document which has been amazingly prescient. And among the things they said were don’t allow looting, for example; get the electricity up as fast as possible; get the water up as fast as possible; don’t let the military disband; send in a couple of hundred thousand troops. All these things that we didn’t do that we should have done that we should have known about that was there. The planning that was done. When people say this war was badly planned, it wasn’t badly planned, it’s just that the planning was ignored. And it was ignored by people having ideological reasons to ignore it . . . I think that intellectual sloth is a vice, I really do. It’s a vice if you’re the president of the United States. It’s not a vice if you’re Randy Moss [Minnesota Vikings wide receiver]. I mean, Randy should study the plays, and watch the film, and know his routes. But after that he can kick back and play video games, I don’t care. But if you’re the president of the United States, intellectual sloth is a vice. And I believe that the man has a history of that. I think that he’s a smart man in many ways, but he didn’t do the job he was supposed to do. And because of that we have young men who wouldn’t have been dying.


B&W:
What prompted you to focus more on politics than satire?

Franken: I did “Saturday Night Live” for 15 seasons, and during those years I wrote a lot of the political material on the show with other people, including Jim Downey, who is pretty conservative. He and I wrote a lot of stuff together. And neither of us ever felt that it was the job of the show to have a political ax to grind. First of all, we kept each other honest, in a way. And really just didn’t see it as appropriate to have, you know, like he didn’t write a piece that was real conservative and I’d write a piece that was real liberal. We didn’t feel like that was what the show was about. We felt that there were so many other creative people on the show that “Saturday Night Live” had a certain role to play. And the role was to be politically neutral and make fun of everybody, which is what we did. So when I finally left the show in 1995 I had a deal to write a political book, and I felt like that was the first time I really had the opportunity to express my own political views, and that was Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot and Other Observations. Now, before I did “Saturday Night Live,” Tom Davis and I worked as a team since, like, the ’60s when we were in high school together. We did political stuff that did express our politics, but when we went to “Saturday Night Live” we didn’t feel that was our job.

B&W: Whatever happened to Tom Davis?

Franken: Well, Tom has actually been doing our radio show quite frequently. We write these bits. He and I are huge Bob and Ray fans, so we do a lot of Bob and Ray-esque pieces.

B&W: I love that story you told David Letterman about taking your son to see Bambi.

Franken: Yeah, I had gone through this long, elaborate thing to cushion that moment [when it's learned that Bambi's mother gets killed]. And Joe [Franken's son] was five, and so that moment happens, and you know, she gets killed off-camera, off-screen. And he says, “What happened to Bambi’s mom?” And I said, “Well, Bambi’s mom has been shot by the hunters, and she’s gone, she’s dead. But don’t worry, it’s just a movie, and it’s not going to happen to your mom, and Bambi’s going to be OK because Bambi’s daddy’s going to take care of him.” And he liked the movie so much that we came back the next week. And there was a little girl in front of us, like about a five-year-old girl, who at the same point in the movie asked her mom, “Where’s Bambi’s mommy?” And Joe said to her, “She’s dead. (laughs).”

B&W: Are there any conservative pundits that you respect or like?

Franken: Yeah, I’m interested in what Bill Kristol has to say. With all these people, I obviously have differences with, but he’s very smart and has interesting things to say. And George Will—less and less—but I used to really be a big fan of his. Sorta growing out of that, for some reason (laughs). David Brooks is someone, I like his stuff every once in a while, and hate it. There are guys that I don’t ever like what they write. Andrew Ferguson I find good.

B&W: Do you give better phone sex than Bill O’Reilly?


Franken:
No! He beats me . . . hands down.

B&W: If you had your wife’s approval, would you rather have phone sex with Ann Coulter, Peggy Noonan, or Katherine Harris?

Franken: Wow . . . wow . . . wow (laughs). You know, that’s almost unanswerable. Hmmm . . . Ann Coulter, Peggy Noonan, or Katherine Harris. It’s a real toss-up. Any one of them would be great (laughs). An embarrassment of riches (laughs).

B&W: Have you got any good Andy Kaufman stories?

Franken: You know what? Andy was hilarious. And what he did was groundbreaking and strange and great. But he was, uhh, what you saw was what you got. He wasn’t that different off camera, at least to me. He was just sorta strange. And when I heard they were doing Man on the Moon, I went like, boy, is there something about Andy that I don’t know to make a movie about this? And I went to the movie and I said, “No there wasn’t.” I didn’t think that was Milos Forman’s best movie, and I thought that Jim Carrey did a great job in the movie, but I don’t think that was a particularly compelling movie. But Andy was brilliant. There’s a documentary on the wrestling thing. I thought that was hilarious. You know the thing about him reading The Great Gatsby [Kaufman claimed to have read the book to an audience one night]? He didn’t (laughs). Maybe he [really] did after he told me he did. Once he sat down and told me he had read The Great Gatsby to an audience and then I found out that he hadn’t from his manager. And I was going like, why did he tell me that? And usually with comedians you get some kind of balance. But with Andy, you didn’t. I never got close to Andy.

B&W: Are there any sacred cows that you refuse to touch satirically?

Franken: You know what, there are no sacred cows, it’s just how you do it. I can easily be offended by a comedian who doesn’t handle something in the right way. And then someone can do an AIDS joke that’s handled in the right way.

B&W: Any examples of comedians that have offended you?

Franken: Uummm. No, usually they are just lousy comedians who don’t understand . . . I wasn’t offended by Andrew Dice Clay. I’m not offended by Howard Stern. They do different things than I do. I got a little offended by [Don] Imus at the radio and TV correspondents dinner on the behalf of other people. And then again, it’s because I just thought he wasn’t doing it right. But there are other times that I like Imus. But sure, I get offended a lot of times by banality, and a very, very lame sitcom will offend me to my core (laughs) . . . You see, I have a theory in my comedy that Downey and I always had in the political stuff we wrote, which I think was somewhat sophisticated. We always had the sorta credo to reward people . . . to write a piece so that people who knew a lot about what we were doing would really like it—would feel especially rewarded for knowing extra stuff. But people who didn’t know that much about it wouldn’t be punished for not knowing. Whereas a lot of comedy that I see does the opposite—it punishes you for knowing things, like humans don’t behave this way. Very often the comedy that offends me is like a sitcom that has people behaving in a way that they don’t behave. Then rewarding you for being an idiot. The jokes about politics that are just so base and stupid and have nothing to do with anything. They’ll offend me. And I’ll be offended by comedy that’s overly precious. It’s like asking a musician what music does he like . . . There’s more aesthetic things that are offensive to me than probably to the normal consumer of comedy.

B&W: What can we expect from your lecture on February 12?

Franken: I don’t know. Is it a lecture (laughs)? It’ll probably be a combination of comedy, politics . . . I like to do a funny show; it’s like what I’ve been doing lately. It goes in and out of being funny and being serious . . . And then we’ll be doing that phone sex thing with Peggy Noonan, Ann Coulter, or Katherine Harris (laughs). And hopefully, hopefully, all three (laughs). &

Hoover Faces Crossroads Election

Hoover Faces Crossroads Election

It’s far too late to rescue Hoover from its urban sprawl nightmare, but voters are going to the polls anyway.

August 12, 2004

For the first time in its history, the city of Hoover will be electing a full-time mayor on August 24. Nine days before the election, the city is scheduled to christen its controversial new Hoover Public Safety Building (located at Valleydale Road and Highway 31), a municipal behemoth that has mayoral candidates foaming at the mouth as they castigate incumbent Mayor Barbara McCollum for saddling Hoover with a project that currently has an estimated $32 million price tag. The structure, which was purchased for just over $7 million, has been described by various mayoral candidates as a white elephant, an albatross, a municipal monstrosity, and a Taj Mahal. Toss in a couple of other red-hot issues like unimpeded development and the booming Hispanic population, and McCollum’s opponents agree that Hoover is at a crossroads of unparalleled significance.

“One of the greatest mistakes our city has ever made,” proclaims candidate Bob Lochamy regarding the new public safety center. Lochamy is a one-time restauranteur, former radio personality, and public-relations and media consultant who peppers his campaign diatribes with quotes from former Alabama football coach Paul “Bear” Bryant. While acknowledging Hoover’s need to expand municipal services to a larger facility, he grumbles that a location other than right across the street from a sign that reads “Welcome to Pelham” might have been more prudent. McCollum’s decision to purchase and move into the new public safety center was inexcusable, according to Lochamy. “If we could impeach or recall an elected official such as our mayor, then, in my opinion, this issue is an impeachable or recall offense.”

Candidate Tony Petelos, former commissioner of the Alabama Department of Human Resources under two governors, and a three-term member of the state House of Representatives, refers to the public safety center as the “albatross down the street.” Petelos explains: “I felt like there wasn’t enough planning and enough information when they bought the building, and now we’re paying for it. The Mayor says it came in under budget, but the problem with that statement is that they didn’t put the police department there. The plan was to move all the police down there. All they’re doing is moving the jail and supervisors. So they’re calling it a public safety center without any police.”

“It’s just a time bomb ticking. It’s not just the day laborers and congestion. There’s a myriad of problems. The core of our city is deteriorating. . . . It is frightening to consider how precarious our future is . . . ” —Hoover mayoral candidate Bob Lochamy

Mayoral candidate and current Hoover City Councilor Jody Patterson calls the public safety center debacle “the biggest government waste project I’ve ever seen. It just blows me away that we waste taxpayers’ money like that. I’m just amazed that the general public has not gone ballistic over what the Mayor did,” said Patterson, adding that a Wal-Mart Supercenter and two Kmarts could fit inside the renovated building.

Candidate Walter Mims said the public safety center “is probably something we need, but I really don’t have much of an opinion. It’s probably something we’ll grow into.” But regarding economics and the blight that results from out-of-control development, Mims would like to see more focus on Highway 31, “the centerpiece” of Hoover. “We’ve got to do something to help the small businesses, which are the catalyst for everything. One of the first things I would do is create a small business council. And I might say ‘no more Wal-Marts!’”

Lochamy pledges to hire an economic development officer, preferably former local sports tycoon Art Clarkson. Lochamy would also like to see a 12,000-seat arena and a water theme park built in Hoover. He envisions revitalization of Lorna Road as a necessary step to ensure that Hoover has a stable, progressive future, and earlier had suggested that several apartment complexes on Lorna Road be demolished so that the new public safety building could go there. “We have a disproportionate number of apartment complexes located in a very tight area. It’s just a time bomb ticking. It’s not just the day laborers and congestion. There’s a myriad of problems. The core of our city is deteriorating,” says Lochamy. “. . . It is frightening to consider how precarious our future is . . . ”

To address blight, Patterson wants to “eliminate subsidizing new developments.” Patterson believes developers have gotten very good at pitting city against city with promises and financial incentives. “Let the market dictate which stores survive. When the demand for a new shopping center is there, the supply will come.”

“If we’re going to do new developments, let’s bring in some new type of retail, like the Bass Pro Shops, says Petelos. “We’re reshuffling Hoover businesses and putting some Hoover businesses at risk because there’s so much competition. . . . If we didn’t annex any more land, there’s still 30 percent undeveloped land in the city of Hoover. There’s a lot of growth potential available. So we need to do a better job with land-use planning. We need a master plan; we need a long-range strategic plan; we need a housing code.”

More than one candidate warns of the “Hispanic problem,” and the implementation of housing codes to limit how many people may occupy an apartment. “All we’re doing is attracting more illegals to the city of Hoover,” warns Petelos. He suggests that Hoover meet with surrounding municipalities and approach the federal government to urge that an INS officer be brought in, with local governments paying part or all of the salary. “So that we’ll have a presence here, so that when we have these illegals we can process them,” explains Petelos. “The problem now is that the Feds aren’t interested in processing them because they’re overburdened because there are only two INS officers in the state. We need to pull our head out of the sand and figure out how we’re going to address it without violating people’s constitutional rights, without violating the legal immigrants’ rights.”

Lochamy fears the gathering of Hispanics at day laborer pickup spots for those seeking work is getting out of control, but admits that area residents are to blame for perpetuating the problem. “We have to look in the mirror. Those who are hiring the day laborers and violating worker’s compensation and payroll taxes [are to blame].”

In addition to limiting the number of people sharing an apartment, Patterson wants to enforce driver’s license and automobile insurance laws. “If they’re illegal, they’re not welcome. If they’re legal, it doesn’t matter what race you are, what culture you come from.”

“With the unemployment low [1.8 percent in Hoover], we need the Hispanic population,” says Mims. “To a certain extent we exploit them, but to a certain extent they take advantage of things, too. Most of them want to be useful, and be contributors to society. . . . We need to get them started a little earlier on getting their kids to learning the language because that really slows them down in our schools. And it kind of holds some of our other kids back, too. We’re getting to be a diverse community, and I think there’s room for all of us.”

Despite repeated requests for an interview, Hoover Mayor Barbara McCollum was unavailable before press deadline.

Holy War Rages On

Holy War Rages On


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Judge Roy Moore announces to his followers that Kool-Aid is now being served in the rotunda.

Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore has continued to defy a federal judge’s order to remove the Ten Commandments monument from the rotunda of the Alabama Judicial Building. In a ruling that has galvanized Christians across the nation, U.S. District Judge Myron Thompson threatened to fine the state $5,000 for each day the granite icon remains.

On Saturday, August 16, thousands of religious zealots rallied at the State Capitol in Montgomery in support of Moore. An hour before the rally began, a Jewish supporter of the 5,300-pound monument attempted to parade around the block of the Capitol while blowing a shofar (a trumpet made from a ram’s horn). “Just like Joshua did when he blew down the walls of Jericho,” an elderly woman filling water coolers explained. Montgomery police put an end to the piercing, horn-blowing call to arms when they told the man he was in violation of a city noise ordinance. A five-foot Styrofoam replica of the Ten Commandments tablets stood nearby as protestors leaned against parking meters, praying. A giant Liberty Bell sat on the back of a flatbed truck like a parade float. A homemade sign read IRS: Stop Defrauding America, while another noted Stop ACLU Tyranny, the “C” drawn like the old Soviet hammer and sickle. A teenager with a T-shirt that read Body-piercing saved my life below a rendering of a hand nailed to a cross passed out anti-abortion pamphlets containing photos of aborted fetuses. A man in a NASCAR cap handed out Southern heritage newspapers. It was showtime at the State Capitol, and summer temperatures made the streets hotter than a tent revival.

Reverend Jerry Falwell and former presidential candidate Alan Keyes were among the notables who journeyed to Montgomery to address the crowd. “If God be for you, who can be against you?” Falwell asked as he opened his address. The reverend compared Judge Moore to Jesse Helms, “It was such a tragedy when the U.S. Senate lost Jesse Helms, ’cause he was one of the few men you could count on every time to say the right thing in the right way about the right subject . . . Roy Moore is one of the few judges in our land with the courage to stand against the tide of secularism.” Falwell condemned “the American Civil Liberties Union, the Americans United for Separation of Church and State, People for the American Way, Hollywood, liberal politicians, Bill and Hillary Clinton . . . and the many, many, many others, in my opinion, who are enemies of the Cross and enemies of America!” Concluding his speech with words from “the first freely elected” governor of Virginia, Falwell quoted Patrick Henry: “It cannot be emphasized too strongly or too often that this great nation was founded not by religions, not on religion, but on the gospel of Jesus Christ.” The Jewish man with the shofar, who had been blowing his horn intermittently to acknowledge support for Falwell, remained silent.

With the flair of a faith healer, Alan Keyes followed Falwell, explaining that religious belief was a viable way by which to govern. Keyes, who looks like civil rights activist Dick Gregory from a distance, was apparently confused about the kind of religious symbol he was endorsing, however. “Here we stand in the midst of a crisis. A federal judge has threatened the chief justice of the state of Alabama,” barked Keyes with evangelistic fervor. “And the judge has told him he’s got to take the Ten Commandments off the wall of the courthouse!” The crowd erupted, as one supporter waved a sign that read I’m a raw-boned, redneck, deer-hunting, devil-hating, Communist-stomping Alabama farm boy and I’m here to say no to the United States federal courts of atheism. Another sign suggested that violence was in order: BOMBard the SOUTHERN PERVERTED (abortionist, homosexuals, anti-God) LAW CENTER with prayer. SEND down the fire on the heathen.

Judge Roy Moore surprised everyone with an unannounced visit to the rally, whipping the crowd into a frenzy with his entrance. He thanked the organizers of the rally and the Foundation for Moral Law for raising money to pay legal fees. “It’s very important, because at this time we have a lot of attorneys’ fees,” he noted with a grin. Moore thanked a rabbi “friend” from New York City who was present, repeatedly attempting to pronounce the Rabbi’s name correctly. “I’ll say it right in a minute,” Moore laughed. Noting that the Ten Commandments controversy is about the “inalienable right to acknowledge God,” Moore, who is fond of writing poetry and posting it on the Internet, explained the importance of his monument. “It’s not about me. I will pass away, as every politician and every pastor will. But the laws of God will remain forever! If this ruling is allowed to stand, it will reverberate from state to state to state to the nation’s capital. And the acknowledgement of God will be taken from us. If we sit quietly by while this inalienable right is taken, even the rocks and the trees and the stones that you see will cry out for judgement! If I should fail to do my duty in this case, for fear of giving offense, I would consider myself guilty of treason toward my country and an act of disloyalty toward the majesty of heaven, which I revere above all earthly kings!”

Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness

Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness

 


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One of the original copies of the Declaration of Independence will be on display at the Birmingham Civil Rights Institute January 10 through 20.

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.” With those words, the foundation of American freedom was set in place three centuries ago. An original copy of the Declaration of Independence (owned by television producer Norman Lear) is currently on a three-and-a-half year journey across the United States, and will make a 10-day stop in Birmingham.

After two days of editing Thomas Jefferson’s text for the Declaration of Independence, the Second Continental Congress, led by John Hancock, approved a final draft of the document on July 4, 1776. That night a Philadelphia printer named John Dunlap printed approximately 200 “broadsides” of the document (a broadside is about the size of a full sheet of newspaper.) The next morning, one copy was entered into the Congressional Journal, while most of the remaining manuscripts were delivered to the colonies by couriers on horseback so the document could be read in town squares throughout the nation. Contrary to popular myth, Congress did not sign the Declaration of Independence on July 4. Instead, they waited for all 13 colonies to ratify it before signing on August 2.

In 1989, only 24 original Dunlap broadsides were known to exist until a flea market patron bought a framed painting for $4. While examining a tear in the painting, the purchaser discovered a Dunlap broadside behind the canvas.

The Declaration of Independence will be on display at the Birmingham Civil Rights Institute January 10 through 20. In addition to the document, the exhibit includes historical photographs and video of social and political movements throughout the nation’s history. There is also a 14-minute film hosted by Norman Lear and Rob Reiner. Call 328-9696 for more information. -Ed Reynolds

Wild Blue Yonder

Wild Blue Yonder


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Bob Gilliland, seen here standing next to the Blackbird, will speak about his experiences as a test pilot on November 14 at the Harbert Center.

Bob Gilliland has spent his life as a daredevil, logging more hours at two and three times the speed of sound than any test pilot in history. But he’s never experienced fear. “I never had any fear of flying. I liked it. The faster, the better,” Gilliland quips. Vertigo, on the other hand, is a constant companion. “Vertigo feels like you think you’re in such-and-such a position or bank angle and you really aren’t. It’s like when you out of bed in the morning and you might feel dizzy as you first get to your feet. It would be similar to that.”

Gilliland’s first solo flight was in a T-6, an advanced training plane. “That was back in 1949. The Air Force had downsized after World War II, and they didn’t care if they washed everybody out. They weren’t looking for pilots,” he laughs. In 1964, the one-time Korean fighter pilot became the first to fly the SR-71 Blackbird, the world’s fastest and highest-flying jet, capable of speeds over 2,000 m.p.h. reaching an altitude of 15 miles. He also tested the F-104 Starfighter that Sam Sheppard (portraying his trout-fishing buddy Chuck Yeager) bailed out of in the movie The Right Stuff (Yeager broke Mach 1, the speed of sound, in 1947). The Starfighter was nicknamed the “Widowmaker,” a moniker that manufacturer Lockheed “never did cotton to all that much,” laughs Gilliland. “They preferred ‘Missile with a Man in It.’” The “Widowmaker” nickname came from the F-104 having an unreliable engine and downward ejection rather than upward ejection from the cockpit. Gilliland has never had to eject out of a jet, though he’s experienced five dead sticks. “A dead stick is when you lose your engine power. And you either jump out or you glide the jet around and you land it. In the F-104, I had five of those.”

There’s little difference between flying Mach 1 and Mach 2 as far as what the pilot experiences physically. According to Gilliland, the most difficult aspect of flying at phenomenal speeds is staying alive. “We had an emergency every flight during the development of the Blackbird. One of the two engines would often blow and the other one would operate normally, and suddenly you’re flying sideways. It bangs around and bangs your head around; in the beginning I was concerned it would perhaps cause what we call ‘catastrophic structural failure.’ That means the tail comes off or something’s too weak and it comes unglued. But luckily, I had the greatest aeronautical designer of all time. If it wasn’t for that, I think I’d be long gone,” he laughs.

His last experimental flight was in 1985 at age 59, and Gilliland snickers when asked if he misses it. “Well, it’s certainly exciting and challenging and fun if you like that sort of thing, and it helps if you don’t mind getting killed.” Regarding his flippant attitude about the dangers of flying, Gilliland explains: “No, it is funny. If you’ve been around fighter pilots, they’ll joke about anything. Nothing’s sacred . . . including their own death. If anybody is sensitive about anything you better not let ‘em know it, or they’ll lean on it. That’s how we weed ‘em out.”

Bob Gilliland will speak at the Harbert Center on Thursday, November 14. Admission is $50 and includes a reception, dinner, and presentation. Call 833-8226 for details. An A-12 Blackbird, a Mach 3 spy craft used by the CIA in the 1960s, is currently on display at the Southern Museum of Flight.

Home of the Brave

Home of the Brave


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Until 1947, the only war veterans officially recognized for their service were World War I vets on Armistice Day. Birmingham resident Raymond Weeks decided that a day was needed to honor all war veterans, so he traveled to Washington, D.C., to present his plan to Army Chief of Staff General Dwight D. Eisenhower. Weeks then organized the first Veterans Day celebration which was held in Birmingham on November 11, 1947. After being elected to the presidency, Eisenhower was so impressed with the Birmingham effort that he signed a bill in 1954 officially recognizing Veterans Day.

This year’s parade will be held on Monday, November 11, at 1:30 p.m. The procession begins at 8th Avenue North and 19th Street, and concludes at 6th Avenue North. For a complete parade route, call 325-1432, or visit www.nationalveteransdays.org.